Orange Is the New Black: A Tittin’ and a Hairin’

Orange Is the New Black

This week the Orange is the New Black episode I’m writing about is “A Tittin’ and a Hairin’.” It’s a brutal episode that focuses on Pennsatucky.

It opened on a flashback where young Pennsatucky has just gotten her first period. She doesn’t know what it is and is convinced she’s dying when she shows her mother. Her mother tells her not to be scared and then transitions into an absolute horror show version of “the talk.” She tells her that now boys will want something from her and the best thing to do is to let them go about their business.

Back in the present, Pennsatucky talks to Coates. He brings her doughnuts and apologizes to her about things getting weird. He tells her, “I’m really sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable or did anything you didn’t want to do, but maybe you also did want to? Because I can be misinterpreting. Women are difficult to read sometimes. Not, like, for everyone. That’s not a generalization. I’m a feminist.” This writing is wonderful. She asks if he’s saying that he likes her. When he says yes, she says, “Don’t worry about the pond thing.”

The inmates gather around the TV to find out if Judy King is being sent to prison. When a news anchor says she’s been found guilty, everyone starts cheering and hoping she’ll be sent to Litchfield.

Sophia tries to get her son Michael to listen to her and realize he has to stop misbehaving, but he tells her to stop pretending she cares. He walks away. When she yells after him to come back, he asks what she’s going to do about it.

Pennsatucky shares the doughnuts with Big Boo and tells her about Coates. Big Boo says, “I still maintain that you’d make a good dyke.” Pennsatucky says she actually likes Coates and not just because of the doughnuts. “We talk about things and stuff,” she said.

In a flashback, Pennsatucky is a teen hanging out in a parking lot. A guy comes up to her and offers her soda in exchange for sex. She says that she only accepts Mountain Dew. She takes the soda and takes him around the corner. While they’re together, she gets stung by something and walks away. He yells at her for leaving him unfinished.

She’s looking down at the sting when another guy walks up and looks at the injury. He gets a first aid kit. She sees the first aid kit and asks, “What are you, a faggot or something?” He says that his family moves a lot and they try to be prepared for emergencies. He says they move every time his dad gets fired for being a drunk. She tells him, “You don’t gotta worry about that around here because everybody’s a drunk.” He says, “I’m Nathan. You want to hang out some time? See a movie or something?” She asks, “What do I gotta do?” He says, “Uh … be my date?” She agrees to go and smiles as he walks away.

Delia visits George Mendez to tell him she has bad news. She tells him that Daya’s baby isn’t his. She says that he wasn’t the only one that had sex with Daya. George says, “No, I’m gonna be a father. I’m gonna get out of here. I’m gonna be the best father anybody could possibly want.” Delia suggests he focus on the positive: if it’s not his baby, they can get him out of prison faster. He says no. Daya and the baby are the only things keeping him alive and they’re going to make him into the man he always knew he could be. Delia says, “Okay, sweetie. Okay.”

Pennsatucky and Coates drive together. She suggests they get ice cream and says they have extra time before they have to get back. He tells her that they’re friends and if she wants ice cream she can just ask.

In a flashback, Pennsatucky and Nathan watch porn together. She says she doesn’t get it and thinks it’s gross and reverted when the guy in the film starts giving the girl oral. Nathan says it’s not perverted. They get naked and start kissing. When he starts rubbing her, she asks what he’s doing and says she doesn’t know if she likes it. After a second, she says, “Oh, Jesus!” He says he’s just taking care of her. After a second, she asks, “Is this what they write songs about?” A second later, she asks, “Who are you, magical man?”

Lorna meets with a guy named Vincent. Unlike her other suitors, he seems to have a lot in common with her and they really get along. He mentions that he’d always protect her from anything and she cautiously says that a guy has been bothering her. He asks what his name is and tells her that he’ll kill him.

In the next flashback, Nathan is moving away. Pennsatucky asks him to please take her with him. He says, “I wish I could.” She tells him that she loves him and he kisses her and says, “And I love you too. And I’m coming back for you, alright?”

When she goes inside, a guy tells her that he brought her soda. She says, “I don’t do that anymore.” She tells him that she has a boyfriend and he says, “Rumor has it he ain’t gonna be around anymore because of his drunk daddy.” He pins her against a wall and starts having sex with her. After a second of fighting, she goes numb.

Back in the present, she’s chatting with Coates on a trip. He gets mad at her because he got in trouble after they were late getting back last time. He says that all she does is get him in trouble. He throws her in the back of the car and starts having sex with her. Again, she goes numb. After a while, he starts saying “I love you.” She’s crying.

Well, this is a good episode to watch if you want to be emotionally destroyed.

Photo Courtesy of Netflix

About Lenny

Lenny Burnham is a TV blogger and co-host of the podcasts Secret Lover and Rerunning Wild, available on iTunes. Follow Lenny on Twitter @lennyburnham.